Is patience key to life’s acceptance?
Can be read in just three minutes.
A good friend of mine and formal psychoanalyst ask me about my shadow work process. At first glance my answer was good. I quickly became aware that my knowledge of shadow, about the dark side of ourselves, and how to fight our inner monsters was quite shallow. My interest in Jung’s shadow concept led me to investigate the points of convergence between his theories and the principles of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), a therapeutic approach I utilise in my practice. The concept of shadow seems to be much more mystical that I am used to, so I started to search it inside myself. Let’s discover what my conscious mind is trying to reveal.
Which of my traits clash with my public image? What behaviours of others trigger me as a reflection of my own unacknowledged traits that I am trying to conceal from the world? These were the primary two questions that led my self-reflection. The answer was intricate, yet a specific detail was prominent. Its seems that, I am uneasy with how everything worthwhile seems sometime to takes forever, and I can’t always control the outcome. Whether it’s publishing a novel, making a movie, or starting a business, each endeavour demands patience, focus, and hope. However, success does not always align with our efforts, focus, perseverance, and self-motivation.
How do we reconcile our feelings and wants with reality?
My thoughts on patience led me to an older paper detailing virtues (Dahlsgaard et al., 2005). Across diverse philosophies—from Christianity and Buddhism to atheistic viewpoints—patience and temperance consistently emerge as key virtues for a meaningful life. However, we live in a fast-paced world of TikTok and AI, where attention spans are short, and instant results are expected. Feelings like anxiety, stress and emergency are prominent daily in lots of peoples lives. How can these seemingly opposing approaches to life be reconciled?
I believe it would be beneficial to focus on the process, not just the outcome, as this could lessen our sense of pressure and improve our patience. You might be wondering how that works, right? As I work on this blog post, I dedicate my attention to each word, recognising that it paves the way for future progress. Although I don’t yet know what the final product will be.
Successfully sticking to my daily routine—working out, eating well, and meeting my writing goals—leaves me feeling empowered and satisfied with my self-discipline. This feeling motivates me to maintain my routines, face life’s challenges and unexpected setbacks, and consistently readjust my approach to keep feeling empowered.
The feeling of satisfaction, which I value greatly, does not come instantly but only after a while. I believe understanding why we’re doing something helps us be more patient.
Reflecting on patience and life acceptance, I believe they may be interconnected and mutually beneficial. Through my friend, I’ve gained valuable insight regarding my shadow work and the time it takes to achieve goals. I hope this inspires you to be open-minded and investigate why certain behaviours or aspects of the world trigger you. Enjoy your exploration!
References:
Dahlsgaard, K., Peterson, C., & Seligman, M. E. P. (2005). Shared Virtue: The Convergence of Valued Human Strengths across Culture and History. Review of General Psychology, 9(3), 203-213. https://doi.org/10.1037/1089-2680.9.3.203
